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Category: angels



Spiritualist Church AngelSince starting this blog, which mostly features posts geared toward the strange and unusual world of the paranormal…I’ve heard from people all over the world. They have shared with me and my blog readers stories of their struggles, concerns, worries and the like. I do believe that when we are dealing with negative stuff…we focus on the negative stuff (because, after all, that is what is going on and of course we are going to focus on it!) and then MORE negative crap happens (where your focus goes, so your energy flows!)

Same with ghost/spirit trouble. You have a problem with one ghost and suddenly they are everywhere! You have family problems and suddenly everyone is upset! You have money trouble and suddenly you are burdened with financial woes! One thing breaks down and suddenly everything is going kaput on you! On and on it goes.

Never are the ups and down of life so apparent as they seem to be than during the Christmas season. It’s a great holiday, representing something quite fantastic, but it’s also a depressing time of year for many. People start thinking about loved ones lost to spirit and miss their physical presence, those who can’t afford gifts for their loved ones feel the crush of disappointment over it pressing down on them, those that go through life on their own feel even more lonely when they see all the “togetherness” going on around them. It’s a great time of year and it’s the worst time of year. BUT, it doesn’t have to be one or the other. No.

To get the Christmas “spirit” flowing…you start spreading some of it! The more you spread, the more comes back to you! It does work like that (and as easily as that!) but it’s hard to get going if things are that bad. When things are going rough for me, I think back to one of the darkest periods of my life (nothing ever has gotten as bad as that ever since! Besides, the story that follows explains why I keep thinking about it).

I was going through a terrible marital breakup and for awhile I thought there was NOTHING good going on in my life. Other than the blessing of my three kids, life totally sucked. My job was a challenge because I’d switched to an area that resented my presence (I was in the military at the time and we were combining two different career fields into one…of course both career fields resented the other! I was moved to the new section and needless to say, they didn’t think I belonged there!), my boss (supervisor) was an ass…no other way to put it! He had ZERO sympathy for the heartbreaking anguish going on in my personal life. His cold responses to my emotional pain made things that much worse! My husband at the time thought a girl half his age was THE THING and though I managed to get him away from her (while offering her condolences by the way…I thought he was as deceitful to her as he was to me!), he soon found another to take her place! My kids were upset to be losing their daddy and so I had their tears to deal with as well as my own!  My finances were a MESS and … as I said, my heart broke. With Christmas rapidly approaching, things just seemed to be getting worse. How was I going to buy gifts for the kids? How was I supposed to show any happiness when I felt NONE? How was I supposed to FEED the kids, let alone find them Christmas presents?

Well, despite all my worry and misery, I prayed. And God heard (as ALWAYS!). Honestly, folks, there is POWER in PRAYER! Although I hadn’t been to church in many years, a couple that lived nearby and were good friends (he and I worked together in the military), convinced me to go to church with them. Although I’d been resisting their invitations for quite some time, one Sunday morning I was tired of moping around the house feeling sorry for myself so I called and said, “Okay. I’ll go to church with you!” Now what do you suppose the church was featuring on that day…my first time going? A six-part series on the LAW OF MONEY. I must reiterate here that my financial situation was quite bad! My kids and I were eating a lot of Ramen noodles, mac and cheese and fluffernutter sandwiches. I kept getting overdraft charges in my checking account and I barely had enough gas in the car to get to work…let alone make a trip to church! But I dressed up the kids and off to church we went. The kids thought it was a treat to get out of the house and I have to admit…I felt the same.

So, the preacher announces that he is going to be doing a six part series on the Law of Money and that it was important none of us missed the next five weeks. Interestingly enough, the church was undergoing some major renovations at the time so it might have been what prompted the “money” series but I don’t care. I felt it was God talking to me…that it was God that led me to church on that particular day and so I listened.

The first law was to give your concerns to God. Tell him what you need (though he already knows!). And to be clear here, I don’t particularly like calling God a “he” but it makes it easier to reference “him” as such so pardon the pronoun reference! So anyway, by clarifying our needs to God, we also are clarifying them to ourselves. There’s a difference between “needs” and “wants” and God WILL provide the “needs”. You have to go after the “wants” (actively seek them to achieve them). So I sat there in my pew and silently told God…”I need some money to pay my bills, buy some groceries (something besides Ramen noodles would be nice) and put gas in my car! Oh, and I need clothes for the girls because they are growing out of everything I have (they were 3 and 4 at the time) and all three of my kids need shoes!” (I took them to church in flip flops and torn sneakers!)

When it came time for the “offering”, I stared long and hard at my checkbook…which was quite pitifully low in the funds department and payday still over a week away! The preacher continued his sermon while the offering plate was passed around. “The more you give,” he says, “the more will come back to you. But give for the RIGHT reasons. Give not because you hope to receive but give because you want to help others! God will provide.” So I took that leap of faith and wrote out a check for over half the balance of my checking account! I no sooner put that check in the plate and my heart was pounding with worry! What had I just done!? Please, God, keep those needs of mine in mind over the next week or so!

As it happened, I had an appointment with a credit counseling agency the very next day. They had approved me for their program and I was meeting with them to set up their financial plan for me. BUT, when reviewing my finance sheet, they started telling me what things to cut from my costs and church donations was one of them! “God,” they said, “will understand that he can’t get a cut right now.” I told the counselor (who meant well, but obviously was quite unenlightened!) that I couldn’t do that. He then told me that I had to follow all of their plan or not be in the program. I politely declined the program and walked out of his office (much to his disbelief!). My heart was pounding because I was placing all my trust in God and though I had doubts that ALL my needs would be met (we are a very “doubting” sort of people aren’t we?), the fact is I was taking actions that showed my willingness to believe that God would provide. So, it’s okay to DOUBT…just so long as you don’t let that stop your actions of faith.

So anyway. I go home and I pour over my checkbook and there’s no money. I start crying silently, feeling sorry for myself as usual and worried about the fact that I was worried (after all, wasn’t I supposed to be trusting God?). When my son comes in and sees what’s happening, he asks what’s wrong and I tell him I’m just sad and that there is nothing for him to worry about (he was 10 at the time). So my son runs across the street to a neighbor and he tells her that his mom is crying. Over comes my dear friend Sylvia to check out the situation. I tell her that I was hoping to find some money to buy a few groceries but it seems that I am in the hole (which meant that I had written a bad check to the church!!!).

So my dear friend Sylvia sits down with me and we pour over all my bank statements (I don’t throw anything away!) and we examine my account from the last time I KNEW for certain it was balanced (which was almost a year ago!!). Another lesson learned…ALWAYS balance your checkbook on a MONTHLY basis…if not more so! And what do you suppose we discover? I made two payments on my car the previous month and there was a subtraction error as well (to my favor!). I call the car dealership handling my car loan and they say that I did indeed make two payments so I can skip this month’s payment since I’d already paid it! (honestly, I don’t know HOW I did such a thing but I’m not going to question it!). Suddenly I went from a negative balance to just over $300. That was a windfall to me.

Over the next few weeks it seemed that money just kept coming to me. A gift from my parents (for Christmas…thank God for great parents!!), a large unexpected child support payment (I didn’t see much in the way of child support assistance and since he was way behind and came into a bit of money, the state sent some of what he owed to me!!), an overpayment on some other bill from YEARS before! (Honestly! The agency…can’t remember who now…was “reviewing” my account and noticed a mistake on their behalf which resulted in me getting a refund!). On and on it went! Friends and neighbors were suddenly offering me clothes for my kids (without my asking for them or even indicating that we were in need of such things!). My dear friend Sylvia got a “buy one get one free” deal on shoes and since she had three kids that needed shoes, she got the free ones for my kids! The church gave us a food basket to enjoy for Christmas and the military also gifted us with help for the holiday!! Help was coming from everywhere!! God does indeed provide…TENFOLD!!!!!

We ended up having a decent Christmas. The kids were happy and their happiness helped heal my cracked heart. Besides, all the positive energy was really lifting my spirits and I soon came to the realization that the ending of a bad marriage is actually a GOOD thing! “They” say that when a door closes another will open and that is so true. The end of one thing just makes way for the beginning of something else (something BETTER). This is why I love the number “13”. In numerology it is considered a number of rebirth, renewal, reincarnation and the like. Basically, the number 13 marks the end of something and the beginning of another! People focus on the “ending of something” part and so think of that awesome number as bad. But I focus on the “beginning of something” part and so look at it as a positive number!

My life has gone nowhere but up since that dark period of my life. I have the BEST husband ever now. He’s been and continues to be one of the best things to ever happen to us! Money has been plentiful. I’m not rich but my NEEDS are all met and that’s huge in keeping the weight of burden off my back! Looking back…as bad as it all got and as awful as it all was…I’d go through it all again…exactly that way in order to get where I am right now!

One other thing to keep in mind as we go through the Christmas season…angels are with each and every one of us! We are never alone and they are ready and willing to help in however we need! From providing parking spots to finding things to alleviating negative situations…angels wait for our request to help! The thing about angels is you have to ASK for their assistance. They can’t just step in and do their thing without our permission. So keep them in mind and they’ll return the favor ten-fold!

To keep the spirit flowing…do you have a story to share? Has God come through for you in times of need? The angels? Let us know!!!

Wishing you ALL positive energy, many blessings and joy through Thanksgiving and on through Christmas!!!! PEACE OUT!

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Marriage Day

Marriage Day (Photo credit: Fikra)

It’s the holiday season of love and all around us we are surrounded with music, joyous color and beautiful twinkling lights. Life is quite magical during this time of year because many people are focused on all that is good with the world and thinking about ways to give those they love a merry Christmas or a happy Hanukkah or whatever it is they celebrate. BUT…not everyone is full of holiday cheer. For some people this is also one of the most depressing times of year. Those who are grieving grieve more, those who are unhappy and sad are even more so. No doubt about it…the month of December amplifies feelings…good and bad.

Since I celebrate Christmas, I am not going to say “holiday” so if that offends anyone (though, truly, I fail to see any offense especially when none is meant in any way whatsoever!)…well, sorry. The option is open to not read any further. Honestly, though, it doesn’t matter your belief and what you do or do not celebrate…what truly matters is the state of your heart. Which in turn often affects the state of your life. If your heart is hurting or your life a mess…then Christmas (this particular time of year) magnifies those states to a pretty high degree. I’m sure you’ve heard the statistics declaring that suicides are high in December. If you are lonely and are unhappy with your life or missing someone you love…then you REALLY feel that when everyone around you is focused on being happy and spending time with loved ones. What if the one you WANT to spend time with is no longer here? HOW do you deal with that? What if your family has fallen apart due to divorce? MAJOR upheaval almost always results from a marital break-up…especially when children are involved. It isn’t only heartbreak to deal with but often financial disaster too. And what if you have your marriage and family in tact, aren’t missing anyone BUT you’ve lost your home, or COULD be losing it? Or you haven’t a job? OR, you do have a job but it doesn’t pay enough to cover the bills let alone Christmas!

Life is freaking tough. It is challenging and disappointing and hurtful. It is also joyous, loving, rewarding and delightful…BUT, not when you are suffering in any way.

I have been through enough heartache in my life to know what it feels like to both celebrate Christmas and all the joys that come with it…and to cry my way through it because of all the other crap life has thrown my way.  One of the worst Christmas’s for me was right after my divorce. I had three kids, they depended on me to give them the Christmas they have always enjoyed…the making of cookies, the hanging of lights, the gifts, the music…all of it. But my heart was aching and I couldn’t bring myself into feeling anything but sorrow. For them I tried to put on a happy face. But I had no money to buy them gifts, no money to buy cookie making supplies, no money to even make a Christmas dinner. I remember worrying through that Christmas with constant fear that they would not be happy on Christmas day. It’s hard to hide the tears falling like a steady rain in your heart. Thanks to my friends and family, the kids had presents under the tree and though it wasn’t what they asked for, they were happy. We were invited for dinner elsewhere so we didn’t have to worry about that either. I don’t think my children were traumatized by that Christmas as much as I was. I remember setting out the kids’ gifts that awful Christmas Eve and crying my heart out. I was not happy with my life and I had no joy in my heart. I loved my kids and was thankful for them…but they did not fill the other gaping holes gouged in my heart. They did, however, get me through that Christmas. Some people don’t even have that.

Someone I am close to is now going through what I went through that awful year and under almost the same circumstances (isn’t it weird how life can repeat itself in a family?).  He has three kids and they are about the ages that mine were when my marriage fell apart. He told me yesterday: “I need to vent a little bit if you don’t mind.” (he said it in a calm voice, an almost incredulous look on his face…a “how did I get to this” kind of look). So I give him my attention and wait for his venting to begin. He continues in a calm voice, “I have nothing in my life. I just lost my wife, two of my kids (they were his wife’s kids from a previous relationship but he thought of them as his) and my home. I have no job, about a dollar to my name and nothing to show for my life. This isn’t how I expected things to be. This isn’t where I thought I would be at this time of my life.” I KNOW how he feels and it totally sucks. Pointing out to him the positive aspects of his life doesn’t change the facts as he stated them. He has a supportive family and he has his three children whom he had to fight hard and long for during his first divorce (yes, he is now going through yet another!). Finding THE ONE…the one significant other that you can spend the rest of your life with is one of the hardest treasure hunts you’ll ever conduct!

When you are sad and hurting, everyone wants to point out all the positive things in your life to help lift you up. That’s all well and good BUT it doesn’t make you feel better. In fact, sometimes it makes you feel worse because you are feeling bad EVEN THOUGH you have those other things! Yes, I was happy to have my kids (they have been my lifeline when I was drowning in hurt) BUT my hurt was coming from the loss of my marriage and all the memories we shared together (doesn’t it suck when you can’t SHARE memories? That’s part of the joy of having them…sharing them with the person who encountered them with you). Yes, I had friends and family to help give me things that I needed…food, clothes, Christmas gifts for the kids…BUT the fact remained that I was not capable of acquiring those things myself and I was without a life partner. I was in the military during my divorce and was living in base housing so I had a house to live in and didn’t have to worry about rent and utilities. I was grateful for that. I truly was! BUT, I didn’t have enough money left after paying bills to buy decent groceries or clothes for my kids. I constantly worried about that. I was always scrounging for change, counting pennies and praying for miracles. Those miracles came…eventually and when really needed (see God, Money, Faith). I can look back on those hard times now and chalk them up as experience…a time of learning and discovery. Learning my strength, discovering my true friends and knowing that God gives us what we need when we need it.

I don’t know if you’ve read The Secret or not but I sure did and I think it’s a great concept. I also believe in its message. I ought to…I’ve had many things manifest in my life that I’ve dreamed of and wished for. BUT, until your wish or dream or need is fulfilled, you still have the sorrow and hurt to deal with! HOW to do it? WHY does life has to be so darned challenging? For all the wonderful messages being thrown out at us to BELIEVE and receive, it isn’t so easy to do that when your life is a mess and/or your heart broke.

Relationships are hard. They are what make or break our life. There are many books and lots of advice given that you must love yourself and be your own best friend and the rest of the world will fall at your feet. BUT, relationships are what makes our life tolerable, joyous, hurtful or sad. The relationships we have with family and kids certainly play a HUGE role in our lives. A momentous role. BUT…it’s the relationship we have with our significant other (our partner, our lover, our other half) that seems to be the driving force behind our happiness. I can say this because DESPITE my wonderful kids, my awesome friends, my supportive and loving family…I was not happy because my marriage fell apart and I lost my partner. Even now, when things are not well between me and my husband…none of the other stuff that is right with my life…all the wonderful family and friends that I have…is enough to make me truly happy. My joy, it seems, rides on my personal relationship with my husband.

Almost every person I know seems to be happy or not depending on the status of their personal relationship with their partner (I don’t say “spouse” here because a lot of people just live together, besides, this also pertains to boyfriend/girlfriend relationships). There are some people who don’t care about their lack of a partner or who don’t care that the one they do have is not all they wanted. That’s awesome for them. BUT, that doesn’t help the rest of us who do seem to hinge our true state of happiness on how it’s going or not going with our “significant other”. This explains how even those who seem to “have it all” (money, a wonderful career, lots of support) end up unhappy and sad…so much so that some even choose to end their life! Princess Diana always comes to mind when I think about someone who “had it all” and yet was very sad. She had some of the best life had to offer: two awesome boys, beauty, riches, love from the world at large…but she was not happy in her marriage and she suffered immensely because of it.

It would be nice if we could learn to be happy with ourselves and accept that anything beyond that is extra icing on the cake of life…but I have no answers on how to get there. Thing is, it’s hard to be happy with ourselves when we aren’t in a good relationship, or have a job we enjoy or don’t have a job at all! It’s hard to enjoy ourselves if others are giving us grief in some way. It’s hard to enjoy ourselves for many, many reasons. The fact is, life is hard. The hardest thing we’ll live through! I think it does help, though, to know that we aren’t alone in this mess. Young or old, rich or poor, we all endure the same feelings. We all want to be loved…and not just by friends and family, but by one special person. Okay…maybe not ALL of us…but I think it’s safe to say that a good majority of the world population wants that.

There’s no answer on how to make this part of our life easier or to make it go more smoothly but it DOES help to know that we aren’t alone. Being alone is the worst thing ever. Aside from those we have in our life…we also have many watching over us in the afterlife. Now, some of you won’t believe that and those that don’t probably don’t read my blogs! But, if you are following my blog, then you probably share SOME of my beliefs and one of them is in God. I also believe strongly in angels…be they Guardian Angels or Spirit Guides or just loved ones who have passed on but keep a loving “eye” on us! (in fact, it was these beliefs that inspired me to write Be Still, My Love!) My life started turning around from abject misery when I began reading material about angels and learning more about them. My life got better…and eventually I did meet my true Soul Mate!! It was my belief in angels, though, that helped my heart to heal…because I knew…just KNEW life could only get better having them on my side. You have to consciously reach out to them though. They can’t just interfere with our life…we must ask to receive their help. It’s just one of those universal laws. That’s why the “ask and you shall receive” thing is such a POWERFUL statement! Asking from the HEART is one of the fastest ways to achieve our wants! Asking out of greed, anger, jealousy and any other negative emotion does NOT bring about what we want. It’s the love in our hearts…be they broken or not…that heals all wounds. Every last one of them!! So, if you are hurting…seek love wherever you can get it…family, church, organizations…and GIVE love back. It will change your life for the better. And that’s my message today.

When I say “Many blessings to you”, I truly mean it from my heart…I am asking the angels (and thus GOD!) to bless your life many, many times over. So, as we go through this challenging month of December…I wish you many blessings and much joy. I wish for you to discover the awesomeness of the angels and KNOW you are not alone…ever. Until next time…Peace Out!!!


Inspirational Writing is one of the most intimate forms of writing.  The message that comes through is either from your higher self (your soul), an angelic being (guardian angel? spirit guide?) or God.  Although the last is really part of it no matter what since God is part of all things.

If you have a problem or concern or would just like a little guidance, Inspirational Writing can deliver just what you need.  Who better to help you than someone who absolutely loves you?

So, for those who have not tried this form of communication, how is it done?  First, there is no right or wrong way.  The only thing you need to do is write (or type if you prefer).  Inspirational Writing is like a written meditation.  Instead of a mental or emotional conversation, you allow words to flow onto paper or onto the keyboard.  The following is just a suggestion on how to approach this very intimate communication.

1.  Start with prayer.  Prayer is communication with God, and Inspirational Writing comes from this very loving source.  So, open the communication with a prayer.  If you have a problem, concern, worry or curiosity, then voice it to God (although God already knows, it helps you clarify what it is you are hoping to accomplish).   Once you have stated your intention for the writing, give thanks for the message you are about to receive.  I can’t quote the bible exactly or tell you where to find it but I do remember reading a passage where Jesus said something to the effect that we should always thank God as if the thing for which we have just asked has already been received.  This reminds me of nightly prayers with my children when they were small.  My daughter always began her prayer this way, “Thank you God for the rest of my life.”  I LOVED that!  I don’t know where she got that from but wow…out of the mouth of babes!

2.  Make sure you are clear about what you are seeking from the communication.  It’s okay if you aren’t seeking anything specific.  If all you want is to open yourself to spirit and see what comes through, that’s totally fine!  If you prefer the message to come from your higher self (an interesting expression but simply means your spiritual self) then state as much. If you would like your spirit guide or guardian angel to come through then say so.  Just know this…whatever your intention when you sit down to write, whoever you wish to contact, whatever you want to know, it will come through.  Just so long as you ALLOW it to happen.

3.  Believe you are worthy of the communication!  You don’t have to be a religious or spiritual leader to receive communication from God or the angels.  You ARE worthy because you are a child of God and our loving Creator is not going to deny you an audience!  Promise.  It doesn’t matter what you’ve done, who you are, how you live, what your faith … when talking to the spiritual realm, none of those things matter.  What matters is that you are a spiritual being, a child of God, and you are seeking communication.

4.  Allow the message to come through.  Just write whatever comes to mind.  Don’t analyze it, don’t edit it, don’t argue with it.  Just LET it.  If the message seems to come slowly at first, stick with it, the more comfortable you get, the better the communication, the easier the words will flow.  Once you set your inner critic aside and just write, you’ll be amazed at what comes through!  Keep writing until you KNOW (and you will know) that you are done.

5.  If whatever comes through is critical and judgmental, then you just communicated with your ego.  Spiritual messages are always loving, positive messages.  ALWAYS.

6.  It is very hard to get our ego out of the way and allow true Inspirational Writing to occur.  One way to do this is to pretend that you are a loving being answering your question.  When deliberately “pretending”, the ego seems to relax and allow things to happen.  However the loving spirit must come through, even if it’s through pretense, it will come through.  Nothing is by chance, so even if you made something up during your pretense…well, where do you suppose those “made up” comments came from?  Your higher Self.

The thing to remember about this form of writing is that it is for YOU.  You don’t need to worry about grammar or punctuation or proper sentence structure.  None of that matters.  Inspirational Writing is spirit writing a letter to you!  Now, if whatever comes through seems worthy of sharing and you’d like to do so, then by all means, share those loving messages.  If people don’t receive them as you did or if they try to negate the message, just remember this…that’s their ego talking.  Unfortunately, ego is a very critical and necessary part of who we are…it helps us function in a very difficult world.  God and the angels don’t have egos.  Any message received during an Inspirational Writing session is done so in love and it will fill you with nothing less than that.

So, give it a try, see what God, the angels or your higher Self has to say.  Blessings to all and Peace out!


This is a list of some lessons that had the most profound affect on my life and so I thought they were worth sharing.  The first two lessons came from my grandfather. He imparted this wisdom to me when I was in my early teen years.  I thought they were great lessons to remember at the time and have learned their value enough to want to share them.  Because of their profound value, they go at the top of my list.

1.  Before you marry someone or start dating him, find out how the guy treats his mother.  If his mother is not in his life, then find out how he treats the woman who is in his life (I added this part here but it applies just as well).  If a man is respectful to his mom, he’s going to be respectful to you.  If he lies to his mom, sneaks around and does things behind her back, he’s going to do the same to you.  If he treats his mom like crap and doesn’t appreciate her, he’ll do the same to you.  If he’s a spoiled “mama’s boy”, he’s going to expect you to treat him the same way.  Now, I know that there are some mothers out there that are not good mothers, and in this case, you will learn a lot about a guy by how he responds and deals with her anyway.  Nowadays, it seems that a lot of grandparents are raising kids, and in that case, how does he treat his grandmother?  Same rule applies.  I have observed this piece of advice over the years and can honestly say my grandfather had it 99 percent right (there is ALWAYS an exception, though rare).

I also believe this can work the other way for guys…how does your prospective wife/girlfriend treat her father?  What sort of relationship does she have with him?  Expect similar behavior and attitude.  But don’t expect to BE her father. Woman who are interested in getting married are looking for husbands, not another father.  Just as most men who are interested in marriage are looking for wives, not another mother.

2.  Before you marry a guy, get him as mad at you as you can and see how he responds.  If he hits you, he’ll do it again and it will get worse as time goes on.  Truer words were never spoken!!  Even if he doesn’t hit you, how does he treat you?  Believe me, it will get worse over time.  So, if you don’t like how he treats you when he’s mad, you might want to reconsider the relationship.  Men can take the same advice and apply it to women here!

3.  Love is a decision.  I really wrestled with this one when I was younger.  I thought that was all wrong.  I used to believe that love was a feeling that just came to you.  But it’s not.  You will always be making decisions throughout your life to love or not.  If you are upset with someone, you can decide to love them or you can decide to hate them.  If you decide on the side of love, then act accordingly.  This one I still have trouble with but its sound advice. Every day of our lives we must make decisions on how to deal with or respond to a situation or person.  At first we often respond emotionally without giving it much thought but then, if you can put your feelings to the side…not out of the picture, mind you, but they also shouldn’t be front and center…and try to look over the whole situation as if from a stranger’s perspective…then you can make a decision you can live with.  Are you going to love or not?  If you decide to love then LOVE. Forgiveness is a decision.  You are deciding with love when you decide to forgive.  If that’s the decision you made, then stick to it!  Don’t forgive one minute, get mad again and take it back then decide to give it again and so on.  If you decided to forgive someone for something, then forgive them and be done with it.  If a new situation arises that requires forgiveness, decide on that situation, don’t bring up a past one and throw it into the mix.  Again, this is a lesson I still struggle with.  But, if I ever get it through my thick head, I’m going to be a LOT happier.  So will you.

4.  Believe in yourself and know that you really can accomplish whatever you truly wish to accomplish.  This one is a hard one because most people don’t really, truly believe it.  I do and then I don’t and then I do and then I don’t.  The thing is, when I look back over my life (like I’m real old or something!!), I think about the situations where I really, really wanted something and eventually, I got it.  I think how quickly it happens depends on our belief and our tenacity.  In all honesty, though, I believe that the Universe will make it happen if we FOCUS on what it is we want.  I know, this is so “The Secret” kind of stuff but the fact is…The Secret has it right.  It’s just hard to accept for some reason.  Can it really be that easy?  We think everything has to be hard and that’s what we get.  Hard.  Some people give up too soon.  To get what you want, you have to hold onto the focus with unwavering determination.  Be stubborn, snub any opinions that tell you otherwise and continue to press on like it’s going to happen.  Those who give up and give up…they will NOT accomplish their dreams.  Sad.  Don’t be one of those people.

5.  Failure is a stepping stone to success.  This one ties in with the one above.  Failure means you are trying, failure means you didn’t give up before trying.  Now, if you give up after a failure, you are done with that dream  It’s over.  BUT, if you try again … well, you might fail again BUT KEEP TRYING because eventually, if you stick to your goal/dream and tell yourself you CAN, then you WILL (remember the little train that could?  BE THE TRAIN).  It’s inevitable.  Ask anyone who has been through the process.  They will ALL tell you the same thing.  The coolest part about failure is that you learn something from the experience!  It’s always good to learn something new so the failed attempt wasn’t a total failure!  Press on…try again.  That old saying you hear all the time…If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again”…it’s been around for a reason.

6.  Truth has many layers.  This one is a good one to remember.  There is usually more to a story then what you are hearing, seeing, or getting.  And when you figure out what more there is to learn or know about something…guess what? There’s more.  There are many layers to the truth of things.  Keep digging, keep looking.  But know this: the absolute truth…the heart of a truth…is ALWAYS for the good of human kind.  You see, at the core of every truth is God (or whatever you want to call it, whatever name you give to it, matters not…if you call me anything and everything but Deborah, I’m still Deborah, what you call me doesn’t change that).  God is Truth and the Truth is Love.  I know, sounds preachy and all that but … it’s also a core truth!!

7.  You are NEVER alone.  Angels surround you.  Loved ones who have passed on and have a strong attachment to you, they also keep an eye on you.  They are real whether you believe in them or not.  The problem is this:  if you don’t believe in them, it limits what they can do.  They can only help you if you ALLOW them to help and if you don’t believe in them, you surely aren’t going to allow them much.  Still, they are there just the same and they surround you with their loving energy.  If you were to be still for a bit and focus on them, you’d feel them.  You’d feel this little well of something inside your chest that spreads out and excites you from the inside out.  Sometimes, you can’t catch your breath for the joy of it.  It’s there.  Believe me.  Or not.  Your CHOICE.  Can you imagine the endless possibilities if you DO believe in them?  Wow.  Skies the limit.  And that’s the Truth!

8.  It doesn’t matter what other people think about you, it matters what YOU think about you.  Now this one is a tough one.  Especially to the young ones and the teens.  I remember high school.  I would rather be invisible than to be noticed and judged wanting in some way.  My first two years of high school were low key.  I hovered on the fringes of everything.  But, I WANTED to be popular and have lots of friends, a handsome, attentive boyfriend and an exciting life.  The problem, though, was I was too worried about what people thought of me to get any of those things.  Oh, I had friends, a core group that I have to this day.  I trusted them.  I let them see the real me.  But for the most part…I went through the first two years of high school hoping nobody noticed me.  And I was unhappy with myself because of that DECISION.  I should have loved myself a little more back then.  Oh, I don’t mean in a conceited, “I’m better than anyone, I’m wonderful and everyone should love me” sort of way.  No, never that.  I’ve heard people say they weren’t popular or they were picked on because of their weight, and YET, I remember there being kids in high school who were overweight and everyone liked them!! True story.  There were nerdy kids and geeky kids (yeah, I’m labeling them because that’s what we do and it’s these labels that we cringe from ourselves) and yet some of the kids that fit those labels were well liked and popular anyway.  You see, it depended on how they felt about themselves.  The overweight kids who were comfortable with their weight didn’t walk around hoping nobody saw their weight.  They were okay with their bodies and so everyone else just responded in kind.  The nerdy kids who enjoyed their nerdiness were accepted because they accepted themselves.  They didn’t walk around hoping no one noticed they were nerds, they embraced it!  And so on.  I started figuring this out my last two years of high school.  I stopped being so quiet and shy, holding back, watching from the fringes.  I started getting involved in things and having fun.  So I didn’t have much money, who cared?  So I wore the same clothes several times throughout the year, SO WHAT.  In the end, the only kids who care about the things you worry about are the kids who care about those things because you do.  If you don’t, they don’t.  That’s the way it works. Instead of slouching along, walk with confidence, give smiles instead of scowls, be happy to be who you are because you are the only one in the world!!!

9.  People have power over you if you ALLOW them to have power over you.  Bullies go around looking for people they can cower.  Do you notice that they don’t bully EVERYONE.  No.  They find the ones who have no confidence in themselves, they find the ones who are scared and they feed on it.  Bullies don’t have a good sense of themselves.  They overcompensate this by trying to make themselves feel better by belittling others.  By bossing around, pushing around, and putting fear in others.  It helps to compensate for their own low sense of self-worth.  Their motto is to boss, push and frighten others before anyone else tries to do the same to them.  People who walk around with confidence are usually left alone.  Some bullies might give em a nudge just to test the waters, see if they might bite, if the confidence is real or a ruse.  But when you don’t respond in fear, when you don’t react in a way that makes them feel powerful, they will go find another victim.  I was the second shortest kid in my Freshman class.  I was shy (as I’ve mentioned) and stayed out of the limelight.  I weighed about a 100 lbs (boy are those days gone!).  One day I was walking down the school hallway and there were four boys (looked like Juniors to me, they weren’t scrawny Freshmen, that’s for sure) and they were tormenting a special education student who I knew was in his first year at our school.  He had Down Syndrome.  Talk about bullies!  I watched as they kept slamming his locker shut every time he opened it.  His arms were full of books. One of the boys made him drop the books on the floor.  When he leaned down to pick them up, another of the boys kicked the books.  As the poor kid scrambled to get them, the other boys kept kicking them away.  I was FURIOUS.  Suddenly, I didn’t care how small I was or how shy, I marched down that hallway and I let those stupid boys have it.  Believe it or not, they backed off!  My energy was stronger than theirs in that moment.  I was on the side of rightness and they were not.  They backed off.  I told them to pick up his books.  They did.  I told them they should be ashamed of themselves. Did they really feel so big picking on him?  Were they all that and more because they could pick on someone who couldn’t stand up to them?  They told me they were just playing around, they apologized to the kid and then walked away.  I stood there in that moment and realized something…size doesn’t matter (so there it is!!), attitude matters!  What you feel inside matters.  Strong energy on the side of love overpowers any other sort of energy.  BUT, use that energy for anything but love and it becomes the other side of the coin.  Remember that.

I know I have more lessons that have profoundly affected my life but this post is getting long and I need to stop.  Hope this helps.  And if you have any lessons to share that affected your life profoundly, please do!! We can all use the support of sharing lessons.  Blessings to you and Peace out!!


cover for my new book

Cover of my book "Be Still, My Love"

As I move closer to publishing my first book, which happens to be a ghost story, I am encountering some really odd happenings.  I can’t help but wonder if it’s the spirit world all in a dither for my pending publication?  More specifically, supportive family members, now presiding in spirit, letting me know that they are with me still and sharing in the excitement of this long-awaited dream!

A couple days ago, I was in the kitchen making myself a morning cup of coffee when one of the toy trains in the playroom suddenly came on.  In order for this train to activate, the smokestack must be pushed down.  Once this is done, it begins singing a silly “all aboard” song and starts chugalugging across the floor.  I walked over to the toy room doorway and looked in to see if maybe one of my cats had inadvertently activated it.  No cats.  The train finished its “track” and then went still.  I found it interesting but did nothing more than go take a sip of my coffee.  And then it came on again.  This time I went into the toy room, picked up the train and turned the switch to the “off” position.  This position allows the kids to play with it without the singing and they can push it around without it trying to move on its own.  I thought nothing more of the incident.  Then later in the day, I was standing in the kitchen talking to my son when all of a sudden the train came on again.  “No way!” I thought, “I KNOW I turned that thing off.”  So I go in the toy room, pick up the train and look at the switch.  It is in the “on” position.  How?  How was that possible when no one has been at the house all day except for me?

During that same day, while reading through my formatted manuscript to ensure all was done properly, the phone rang.  The caller ID said it was my husband.  I answered the phone and heard the car radio airing an advertisement.  Since my husband did not answer my repeated greetings,  I figured he’d dialed me by mistake.  Then my husband finally comes on the line.  “Hello?”  When I answer him, he says, “I didn’t hear you call me.”  I said, “You called me!”  And he wonders how he could have done that for he didn’t recall touching the phone.  So we laugh it off and hang up.  Not a minute later, the phone rings again.  I look at the caller ID.  It says that it is my husband’s sister.  Since I couldn’t even remember the last time she called us (and never on the house phone), I wondered if something were wrong and quickly answered the phone.  “Hello?”  All I get in response is what sounds like a television ad.  Looking back on it, I’m wishing I’d paid better attention to those ads!  But anyway, I stay on the phone until a voice comes on, “Hello?”  Once again I received a call from a caller that was not intentional.  What are the odds of that happening within the span of seconds and both calls having ads going on when I answer the phone?  To me, these odd occurrences, the things that make you go “hmmm”, are messages from spirit.  At the very least an attention getter, the equivalent to a spirit tap on the shoulder.  Not one to ignore these special messages, I’ve been pondering on them and the conclusion I’ve come to is that my family in spirit are as excited for me during this time as I am for me!!  Though they are not here in the physical world to share in my joy, they are still here with me and sharing my joy!  And I find that quite comforting.

Last week I attended church.  I don’t go often enough and I really should remedy that because I do so love the atmosphere there and the people.  It’s a Spiritualist church and it is where I feel the most comfortable of all the churches I’ve attended.  I’ve received some wonderful messages from loved ones during the part of the service where messages from “beyond” are passed on.  My message on this day (not everyone gets a message so it’s quite special when you do get one!) was from three of my uncles.  I knew right away who they must be.  My dear uncle Paul who always supported me in my writing, who encouraged me to keep on with my dream “no matter what”, my uncle Lafayette who contacted us soon after his passing to let us know he was well and happy and my great-uncle Norman who always loved my writing (knowing this, I wrote to him as often as I could manage).  They told me that a new phase of my life was about to begin (10-4 on that one!!) and they want me to make the best of it.  They also wanted to remind me to watch how I presented myself, that I needed to put myself out there and let everyone see me for who I am but to be at my best while doing it!

You see, I’ve written a book which centers around a haunted resort.  There’s a lot of stuff in that book about spirit contact and life after death.  Now that I’m about to share a story concerning such matters, I best conduct myself properly.  Who is going to take my writing seriously if I’m coming across as some weirdo freakazoid?  I am not out to make enemies but there are people who are not going to like a story like mine.  And really, that’s fine.  There are lots of stories out there that I don’t like either but I certainly don’t begrudge their existence.  We all must follow our life paths, after all.

Speaking of which, I have found that when we are indeed following our life path, we encounter more and more “hmmm” moments for they are a form of spirit messages telling us we are following the path we intended when entering into this particular life journey.  I’ve also found that the universe (God) helps us along in the realization of our dreams and hopes, especially when we are in harmony with our life purpose!

So I take these strange little happenings and the messages from spirit as encouragement.  I’m following the path in life I was meant to follow and the dream of being an author that came into being at the tender age of eight, is finally coming into fruition.  How exciting.  I can’t wait to see what happens next!  Are you following your dreams?  Do you get strange “hmmm” moments?  Truly, I wish you all the best as you travel down your own life path.

Blessings to all and peace out.


The title of this blog is a famous line in the “Sixth Sense” movie that became a common known phrase.   The boy in that movie wasn’t a medium per se, but he definitely had the gift of mediumship.  I must admit a fascination for people who are sensitive to “the other side”.  I believe we all have the ability to see through the “veil” into other planes (dimensions, realms, spheres of existence) but a majority of us do not.  Where some of us are born with a natural ability to use this “gift”, the rest of us must strive to develop it (me!), or are content to leave it to others to do.  And some, of course, condemn the practice or refuse to accept such things even exist!

My first brush with a medium was when I attended a Psychic Fair in my twenties.  I’d been experiencing some amazing spiritual occurrences and decided to attend a psychic fair to see if anyone could explain to me what was happening (I was having visions, hearing sounds, dreaming some pretty awesome stuff and having lots of interesting coincidences).  After walking around and visiting the various “vendors”, I found myself attracted to an Indian man who had a large crowd around him as he answered questions.  He looked over the crowd and caught my eye and waved me forward.  My heart pounding, I walked up to him and he put his hand on my shoulder.  He looked me in the eye and said, “You are attracting many spirits.  They surround your light.  You have a gift you are not using.”  Of course I wanted to know what my gift was even as I ignored the uncomfortable thought that dead people were surrounding me!  He told me it wasn’t for him to say, that I had to discover it myself.  I thought it was a gimmick to get me to pay for a reading.  But his sign-up page was full and he wasn’t taking on any more requests.  What he told me, he freely offered.  After wishing me luck, he moved on to someone else in the crowd and left me standing there forgotten.

After walking around a bit more, I finally found a woman who channeled a spirit guide who answered whatever questions I could ply “him” with in the 15 minutes I paid for.  Never having had such an experience, I wasn’t sure what to expect but after a minute of silence, the medium before me suddenly lifted her head with a different air about her.  Her soft voice had firmed and her gentle gaze was now piercing and direct.  I found it oddly uncomfortable to meet her eyes.  I asked her what my gift was.  She answered that I was surrounded by many spirits and that they all were waiting for me to communicate with them (I admit to wondering if the psychics at this fair used this tactic on everyone but nothing like that was said to my friends who attended with me).  Why? I asked.  She said that was for me to learn.  Frustrating!  What’s with all the cryptic stuff?  So anyway, she told me a few other things and I went on my merry way.

That was a long time ago and I’ve yet to discover this “gift” the Indian man spoke of.  But, I have visited many mediums since then.  Some of them give generic information and I quickly dismiss those encounters.  But, there have been others that have known things they couldn’t possibly know about me or my loved ones who have passed on.  I KNOW these authentic medium communications are the “real deal”.  It fascinates me to no end.  I would love to be able to do that.  Even though it also frightens me just a little.  Not because I fear the dead, but because I know dark forces exist in the world and I don’t want to become a target to them.  So, maybe my fear holds me back, I don’t know.  I can communicate easily enough through the Ouija (though I don’t really use that much), through Automatic Writing, through Table Tipping and I’ve channeled a spirit whom I’ve thought of as an “angel” (see my post “The Care and Handling of Spirit Contact“).  As for the channeling, I get too self-conscious about the whole process to allow it to happen and so I don’t do it anymore.  I’ve taken a mediumship class but again, I get self-conscious about what others might think of me that I hinder the whole process.  For some reason, I am not self-conscious about the other forms of spirit communication.  Maybe because channeling is such a personal thing.  As for mediums, some of them channel spirits but most of the time they just act as a go-between for the spirit and for whomever the spirit has a message.

It was my fascination with mediums that I wrote my book “Be Still, My Love“.  I mean, really, wouldn’t it be the coolest thing to have the ability to talk to loved ones who have crossed over?  But then I also wondered how a medium might handle a horrible tragedy in which they thought the death unfair or wrong.  How would they handle it if things didn’t go the way they thought things should go?  Do mediums lose their faith?  Can they get it back?  These were the things that floated around in my thoughts as I developed the character of Tess Schafer, a medium whose husband and dog were killed by a drunk driver.  The fact that the angels didn’t warn Tess of her husband’s pending demise made her angry.  She also railed at God for the tragedy.  Since ghosts, people who have died and now remain “trapped” here on the Earth plane, also fascinate me, and mediums and ghosts sort of go hand in hand, I came up with the idea of a resort being haunted by two tragic young lovers whose deaths are now under suspicion.  I believe most hauntings are because of restless spirits who cannot move on for some compelling reason.  I thought putting Tess back in her element (a haunted resort) even though she had lost her faith and thus her ability when her husband died, would create an interesting story.  It did.  I didn’t plan the book.  I never knew what was going to happen until I sat down and started typing.  Going through Tess’s journey with her was a compelling process.  The introduction of Kade Sinclair, a former Marine recovering from serious wounds sustained in Afghanistan, and a skeptic about the existence of ghosts and Tess’s ability only added another interesting perspective to the story.  Two people, hurting in different ways, searching for answers, it made for a pretty cool story and I thoroughly enjoyed writing it.

This is why I write, for the stories that come from “out there” (the universal consciousness?  who knows!).  There’s something to be learned from each and every thing brought into existence.  Every book, every movie, every picture, every  song, every speech, every piece of art…whatever it is brought into creation, has something to teach us.  Seeking those lessons, discovering their answers…there’s the real challenge in life!!

So, what say you?  Do you agree that the creative process is a spiritual one?  Do you believe in mediums?  Have you had any experiences you’d like to share?  Please do!  Blessings and Peace Out!!


Spirit contact isn’t just about talking to dead people.  It’s also about communing with angels.  What’s so great about this is knowing we are never alone, without help or defenseless.  I cannot count the endless ways in which the angels have helped me.  In future posts I may share some angelic stories, but this post is about parking spots.  Maybe it seems like a simple thing, but I tell ya, when I really need a parking spot, it’s like the most important thing in my life at that particular moment!

Just yesterday I was running late for an appointment at the Veteran’s Administration Hospital and had to ask for their help on this very issue.  The VA center does not have adequate parking for the amount of visitors that frequent the place.  Unless you get there early in the morning, forget getting a parking spot until you’ve driven around and around and around.  Eventually you either give up and head for another parking area that’s about a 10 minute walk away or you just keep waiting until a spot becomes available. The problem with that is you better be RIGHT THERE or all the other cars waiting for a spot are going to try and grab it away from you!  I didn’t have time for all this drama so I asked the angels to arrange a parking spot for me while on my way there.  One thing to remember is to give them enough time to arrange it.  Asking them for a spot when you are already there is a little unfair.  So anyway, I get to the VA Center parking lot and spotted my spot right away.  Interestingly enough, two other cars were trolling along waiting for spots.  Obviously they didn’t see the one the angels arranged for me! (this has happened several times!) I pulled right on into my spot, thanked the angels for their help and made my appointment on time.

In all honesty, I tell you that EVERY time I have asked for their assistance in this way, they have helped me out.  I always thank them for their help because showing gratitude is the right thing to do.  Some people have told me that they’ve tried this method and it works once in a while but not every time.  If it doesn’t work, then you aren’t allowing it to work.  You must accept that they can and will help you or their hands are tied (or is that wings?)  We can only accept things we believe and if we ask for a parking spot but don’t believe it’s possible for them to arrange it, well that’s what you get.  I have never been let down.  I’ve let myself down forgetting to ask them!!

Although this isn’t about parking spots, I just wanted to add a quick note that I have asked for angel help when arguments are happening either between myself and another person or between others that I care about.  It’s just so wonderful when the problem is miraculously resolved and almost immediately too!  My problem is that my emotions get in the way sometimes and I won’t ask for their help because I’m being stubborn or I forget to ask because I’m too stirred up.  Another thing they are great helpers with is finding things.  If I lose something and a quick search comes up empty handed, I ask the angels to help me find it and they do!  It’s just so great having their assistance in my life and the thing is, they are here for each and every one of us. How awesome is that?

So, in many ways and means, we are not alone … ever!  Need a parking spot?  Need to find something?  Need some help in resolving arguments? Whatever it is, ask the angels.  They are always on call!!

A few links to check out if you’re interested!

Angel Guidance – Seven Tips for Connecting With Your Angels

Guardian Angels

Angelic Help

Your Special Angels

Blessings and Peace Out!!

God, Money, Faith


 

I’ve been writing posts about my supernatural experiences with ghosts and spirit contact but now I want to share the amazing experience I had with God about eighteen years ago (not that I haven’t had any amazing experiences with God before then or since, but there’s one story in particular that I feel moved to share).

I’ve always been strong in my faith, even during times when I’ve not been affiliated with a particular church.  At eighteen I joined the Catholic church and I was quite happy with that until my ever changing beliefs soon collided with church doctrine and we parted ways.  I eventually came to the conclusion that no church had it ALL right so decided to just follow God in my own way.  But, as happens when things go bad or tragedy strikes, I was soon looking for a church to turn to when my marriage fell apart.  Suddenly I am a single mother with three young children and my finances a mess.  He (the ex) hightailed it to greener pastures and left me with the aftermath of unpaid bills and empty cupboards.

I was in the military during this awful time.  It is a demanding career and a huge consumption on a person’s time.  My bosses didn’t care that I was now a single mother (they didn’t issue me those kids!) and had daycare issues and the like, they only cared on me spending 70 percent of my time catering to their demands even if said demands were nothing but silliness.  For instance, there was this one time when I had to stay after work to SWEEP THE ROAD!! with a BROOM!  Why?  Because a … wait for it … GENERAL (gasp) MIGHT (yes MIGHT) come out to our section.  Since we stored the Air Force’s stockpile of explosive paraphernalia, our duty section was far away from the main part of the base…just in case we had an accident.  We didn’t after all, want the base populace to blow up!  We didn’t get a lot of high brass (military VIPs) visitors.  So, on this occasion we labored all day to make our area look pretty.  Heaven forbid if the ROAD was DIRTY should the general traverse it in his car!  No, the military isn’t always stupid like that, but they have their moments (I always thought if they’d just put a few women in charge, things would have made more sense).  But I was operating in a man’s world back then (more women in the higher echelons now thank goodness) and so there you have it…I’m paying for extra babysitting and losing even more time with my kids so I can sweep a road of dirt just in case a general decides to lower himself and visit our humble unit (and no, he never made it out).

Things just went from bad to worse for me.  I was quite devastated at the breakup of my marriage and was many miles away from my family (I was in Florida and they were all in Maine).  I didn’t have them to lean on for support (though I did spend HOURS on the phone with my sympathetic mother!).  My financial situation was getting worse and worse.  Thank God for the angels on earth…my friends!!  I was fortunate during this time to live on a wonderful street (in a duplex provided by the military) with some really great people.  A recent move that had God’s influence all over it for I had just moved there from off base a few months prior.  Had I still been living in town at the time of the break up, I would have lost everything…my home, my career, my credit!  Why? Because while living off base, I didn’t know that many people  and none of my neighbors.  While living off base, I had to pay rent and utilities.  Something I wouldn’t have been able to do had I still been there when my marriage ended. But at my new home on base, I didn’t have to pay rent or utilities (the military gives its members an allowance to live off base and they take that allowance away when you move onto the base.  My off base living expenses, however, had far exceeded the allowance I was given).  My new neighbors became my closest friends.  They really helped keep me together during this black period of my life.

I remember many nights of despair in those first few weeks after the breakup. I would hide in my home while my neighbors visited each other outside and cry because my kids were hungry and I didn’t have much food in the house. I did not want to share my shame with anyone and it was a lonely time for me.  I felt a failure at everything.  My career was hurting for I had a boss who didn’t have much of a heart … truly, he’d stare of me with cold, unfeeling eyes as I tried to humbly explain why I was five minutes late to work, or why I was sitting at my desk crying quietly as I labored along.  It didn’t matter the many HOURS I stayed late to work on his sudden whim, doing stupid stuff…like sweeping roads.  He didn’t care if my kids were sick or the car broke down or that my babysitter couldn’t watch the kids or whatever. None of my woes mattered to him in the least.  I lamented at my luck to get someone like that for a supervisor (the first in my chain of command).  And even that set of circumstances was a lesson for me.  But something I won’t go into in this post.

On one of my worst nights (sobbing over the financial mess I was in), I get a phone call from a friend.  She and her husband had been trying to get me to come to church with them.  I needed God in my life they said.  I told them that I already had God in my life.  But I needed the support of a church they said. They were Baptists.  I was an ex-Catholic with occult beliefs (spirit contact, palmistry, numerology).  I knew for sure the Baptist church was not going to accept those beliefs either.  But I needed some spiritual support.  So  the phone call came at just the right time.  After months of saying no to their invitation to go to church with them, I finally agreed.

Can you imagine my absolute surprise when I go to this church and the minister announces that he is going to start on this very day, a six part sermon about MONEY!!?  I had a little less than 200 dollars in the bank and payday was over a week away.  I had hardly any food in the house (was going to go shopping later that day) and my car was low on gas.  My kids needed shoes and the girls (3 and 4) were in sore need of clothes. I was pretty sure I wasn’t going to be able to meet my financial obligations come next payday.  I was in utter despair at what to do (which is why I finally decided to go to church).  The Friday before this particular Sunday I had gone to a credit counseling agency.  They agreed my life was a financial mess and said I qualified for their program.  I was scheduled to meet with them again in a couple days to sign up for their assistance.  And here, on this Sunday when I FINALLY gave in and went to a church that I never thought I’d attend because I’m not Baptist and knew they wouldn’t like me believing the things I believe, the sermon is about money!! The first in a six part series!!  This, I thought, is God at work.

The church was also (coincidentally) trying to get enough money to build a new addition and buy new pews.  It was a very costly venture and they needed their parishioners to come on board and donate the funds to make this happen. This might have been the driving force behind the minister’s decision to do a six part series “the law of money”.  I don’t care.  That day changed my life.

The gist of that day’s sermon:  God provides for his own.  Trust in him and he will take care of ALL your NEEDS (not necessarily all your WANTS, but definitely all your needs).  Yes, this takes a leap of faith.  But one that is good on its return!  Show God you believe and God will show you that your belief is a solid FACT.  Trust God.  Give generously now and don’t worry about where the money is going to come later.  It will come.  Sort of the “if you give it, the money will come” kind of philosophy (this was many years before “The Secret” came out promising similar results!).  When it came time for the collection plate to come around, I pulled my checkbook out of my purse and stared at it long and hard.  The minister was in earnest at this point (it was collection time after all!) about trusting God.  If you Give, so will you Receive…TENFOLD! I decided to trust God.  I wrote out a check for a little over half of what was in my account.  I gave the church $100 knowing it was going to severely cut me short of funds.  My heart was pounding.  After putting that check in the collection box, I wanted to snatch it back.  Was I stupid?  And then, “Sorry, God!! I DO trust you!!”  It was a huge leap of faith for me.

A couple days later, I went to meet with the credit counseling agency.  I had to show them my income, my bills, and the estimated amounts I spent on various things.  The idea was that I pay them, they pay my creditors and I follow their strict budget to the T.  The first to go on my list of liabilities (what I paid out)?Church donations!  My heart did a flip flop.  Oh dear!  I was supposed to be trusting God and here the credit agency was telling me “God will understand that you just can’t afford to give any money to the church right now”.  I had to agree to their budget or it was a no go.  I chose to decline their help.  They wanted me to deny God and I thought that a sure sign that I wasn’t supposed to be there.  Now, just to be clear…I think credit agencies have a place in the world.  They have helped many, many people.  But at this time in my life, it wasn’t for me.  It wasn’t the particular journey I was to travel.

I went home that day with hope in my heart but also fear.  What if…no, I just couldn’t allow my faith to waiver.  A few days later, the day before payday, I’m balancing my checkbook (so I can pay upcoming bills) and it appears that I am overdrawn.  I can’t believe it!  I remember feeling so bereft, terrified, alone. I lay my head down and sobbed my heart out. My son (he was 9) came in the house, saw me in my moment of despair and ran back out.  He ran across the street to my friend Sylvia’s house and told her, “Mom is crying!”.  This dear friend, one of my angels on Earth, came right over.

“Debbie, what is wrong?”  I waved at my checkbook.  “I’m broke, overdrawn and I’ve hardly any food in the house.  I’ve been feeding my kids macaroni and cheese for the past three days.  How much more will they eat of that stuff?”  It was a low point.  It was.  Sylvia took on a no-nonsense, we’ll fix it attitude.  “It’s okay, dear, we’ll figure it out.”  She sits beside me and we go through my checkbook.  I dig out bill statements and bank statements (thank God I don’t throw anything away!) and we go through every single thing.  A mistake!!!  I made two car payments that month!!  A quick call to the bank and yes, I did pay them twice (no I do not know how it was that I did this) and no, I don’t owe them this coming payday.  Just like that, I have 300 dollars!!  A windfall for me. Sylvia invites us to her house for dinner.  She has extra she says.  Plenty to go around.  Did I mention about how good a friend she was?

The next day I get a phone call from Trish, another friend.  “Debbie, I have a bunch of clothes that will fit the girls, do you want them?”  (she had three daughters all older than my two girls).  Yes!!  Sylvia strolls in a few minutes later (within moments of me getting off the phone) and she hands me new shoes for each of my kids.  “I bought my kids (she had three children too) shoes and it was a buy-one-get-one-free deal.  I picked up the free pairs for your kids.”  Did I mention how great an angel she was?

The weekend following the end of the church’s series on money, I make the four hour trip to Georgia to visit my wonderful friends Robin and Steve.  I needed to get away from it all and where better to go than to see more good friends?  I was nervous about the trip because my tires were bad but I decided to trust God in this as well and off we went.  While there, Steve takes my car, tells me he’ll be back later.  When he did so…new tires!  An oil change!  Thank God for them, all my wonderful friends! Sylvia, Nita, Chong, Trish, Robin, Steve … angels on Earth.  Each of them, now aware of my situation, bringing me and my children the things we need.  No questions asked.  No expectations in return.  Wow. God was making good on his promise.  He was providing for my needs and using my friends to make it happen.

I attended all six sermons on money at that Baptist church.  I let everyone know that he (the minister) was speaking a great truth.  Trust God and he will provide!  I was living proof of it!  I never did have any problems after that of meeting my financial needs or getting what I needed.  Things just worked out. (They still do!!)  I even remember getting a check in the mail because I had overpaid something else (way back when) and while doing an audit, they discovered it!  Money just came to me one way or the other.  My parents came for several visits (something we thought wouldn’t happen because of their own issues but then things would clear up and they could come after all!).  Their visits helped immensely.  Not just financially but emotionally.  I hated it when they left to go back home.  I tell you, if I needed something, I thought, “God will provide” and I just didn’t worry about it.  And guess what?  God provided!!

That all happened about 18 years ago.  The philosophy on money that I learned back then has continued to work for me ever since.  Sometimes I do have a relapse and catch myself worrying about money and all the financial demands that must be met.  When I realize what I’m doing, worrying about something God can take care of, I have to stop myself and let it go.  Worry is an indication of faithlessness.  I have to remind myself to trust God.  He has never let me down.  God doesn’t let anyone down, especially those who put their trust in him.

I know this sounds a bit like a sermon but it’s a testimonial.  Every word true. With times being so tough, I thought it a good time to share my own tough times.  God bless everyone reading this post! May God provide all your needs. Amen.

 

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